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Porcine Prime Ministers, Primeval ’s dodgy calendar, Nintend-bingo and loads more…

A brown-skinned Gandhi appears with our face, complete with glasses. He’s trim and muscular, unlike us. He wears a yellow trucker hat, sports a Snidely Whiplash mustache and pink-printed jacket straight out of 1991. With golden, pointy shoes in tow and a gigantic hammer to wield, our fighter steps onto …

Publishers, are your star developers taking too long between entries for your biggest franchises? Fans moaning that the new sequels aren’t as good as the old ones? Well the HD remake collection is the solution for you! Konami has shown that it understands this handy modern fix, with the Silent …

It’s hardly surprising the meteoric success the Uncharted franchise has experienced when you think about the elements of success that go into each game: locations that include beautiful vistas, long-forgotten temples and snowy peaks, fast stop-and-pop gun play, intricate puzzle-solving, death-defying platforming and great stories with even better voice acting. …

Hello fright fans, my name’s Sam Ashurst and I’m Total Film’s resident cult horror expert. I spend so much time banging on about ’70s giallo movies, ’80s VHS trash classics, ’90s serial killer flicks and ’00s foreign chillers that TF has finally decided to give me my own column. Possibly …

At long last, Aliens: Colonial Marines hasbeen given acold, hard release date. Well, release month – actually, more like release season. After five years of gestating in Gearbox Software’s stomach, SEGA today announced the long-anticipated shooter based on FOX’s sci-fi film franchise will burst through in a haze of blood, …

To life’s many great imponderables – Where did we come from? What’s our purpose? Does God exist? Why did they make a fourth Scream movie? – we can now add the following question: would watching The Beaver without any awareness of Mel Gibson’s monster raving loony antics make it a …

Dive! Dive! Dive!

Begged by John Waters to “make another old-school Gregg Araki movie”, the filmmaker duly obliges with an unhinged, saucy frolic that harkens back to such earlier favourites as The Doom Generation and Totally F***ed Up. The latter is one way to describe Smith (Thomas Dekker), a film studies student at …

You can probably guess one of them